The end of the 60’s and beginning of the 70’s were very exciting for my family. My brother who I did not know I had, after 22 years showed up at our door. After an emotional shock we started catching up about each other.
For almost one year, he would come and visit us every weekend. It is important for you to understand that these are the fragmented memories that I have from that time. I know that almost every weekend he was there for a while. Those weekends were very special, principally for me. I would expect his arrival Friday with excitement.
Of course he would stay in my room. We had to negotiate who would sleep on the mattress on the floor, and who would stay on the bed. We also had to negotiate all the other spaces in that small room. I do not remember who slept where. For me that was not important. The important thing is that I would have my brother for the whole weekend.
The other special aspect of his visit on the weekend was that he would play soccer with us. I do not need to tell you that he played on my team. He was a goalkeeper, and a very good one.
So, for almost a year we had this special event in the life of our family. Our brother would come and stay with us for the whole weekend. One year later or so, he did not show up. I thought that something more important or urgent came up. But then the next week came, and he did not show up again. Because I was young, I did not hear anything about the reasons, and I still do not know why he did not come anymore.
For a long time I did not hear from him. The last time that I heard about him, I was in the seminary and my dad told me that Tarcisio was attending the Cursillo and they wanted him to write a note to him. Unfortunately, I did not have any information about him such as address, phone, contacts, etc. So for me in the same way that he came, he was gone, and I could not do anything about it.
During the years I have been trying to find him, with no success. With the advent of internet the hope of finding him returned. Since then I have been using all the instruments that I have, Google, Facebook, Orkut, etc. to find him, and I am still hoping that one day I will be able to locate him and reconnect with him, since he is now one of the few members of my immediate family.
Above Tarcisio with me and my sister, and below Tarcisio with my mother and father.
When I ponder my experience I just cannot avoid thinking about the life of the church. There are some important lessons that as a church we should learn from this story. The first one is the reality that we have other brothers and sisters that we do not know yet. The second is that when God decides to put us together, we need to learn how we will live with each other. We will need to learn to negotiate space, styles, and everything else.
The third lesson is to learn how to work together. In my case we learned to play soccer with each other, and we were part of the same team, even though we played in different positions.
The fourth and most painful lesson is to learn to live when the other leaves. That was the lesson that I had to learn when he did not come back to stay with us. We live in a time when we see churches splitting, brothers and sisters leaving for any reason, and we do not know how to handle or sometimes we handle in a wrong way. We cannot forget that we are brothers and sisters, and we should learn that.
I am still hoping to find him. I am still searching for him. He is my brother and I did not forget him.
Have a blessed week,